Just when you thought it was safe to sexually harass people in the workplace, executives can now buy desktop guillotines, hypnodisks, and siege engines!

Apparently they all work dangerously well, but I would much rather keep them as a source of implied power through intimidation rather than actual use, or out of just plain morbidity. Well, maybe I would use the guillotine to cut grapes and carrots into more manageable pieces (possibly in front of an incompetent subordinate). I could also play with the ballista nervously during an annual review while popping uppers faster than a second grader going through ritalin withdrawal.

I wish I could collect them all like free prizes in Happy Meals. Only in my perfect world (sigh).