If you're like me, and all your friends are getting married and becoming pregnant (or vise versa), then you are sick and tired of getting minute by minute updates on Junior's bowel movements and being on the receiving end of quizzical looks when you politely explain that bringing up your own little Satan just doesn't interest you.
Next time one of my friends becomes an incubator and has the nerve to release the contents within upon the world; I'll know just what to give:
1) The "They Shake Me" baby t-shirt from T-ShirtHell.com
2) Some MP3s of Black Rattle (death metal versions of nursery rhymes as sung by Greg Behrendt)
So far I can only find Itsy Bitsy Spider and Where is Thumkin?, but I'm sure someone has a bootleg somewhere.